Marie Osmond nabs her own talk show in '09

So maybe she can't dance, but we certainly know she can talk: Marie Osmond, who finished third last season on Dancing With the Stars, announced Tuesday that she'll return to daytime in fall 2009 with her own syndicated talk show. This is Marie's second attempt at emulating Oprah: She and brother Donny Osmond previously hosted an afternoon talk show in 1998, but it was canceled after only two seasons. Given all that she's experienced in the last few years alone — the death of her parents, a painful divorce, and an embarrassing on-air fainting spell — Osmond admits she has much more to share with fans this time around. "I've been through pretty much everything," says the 48-year-old mother of eight. "I don't have a million nannies. I take care of my kids. I'm just about the most authentic person you can be."

Osmond is also considering doing a prime-time special (or two) with Donny, who's busy exploring his own options in TV. And no, they don't involve sporting a pair of Danskins.